Category: Joke Board
The Top 14 Last Words of Jerry Falwell
(Part I)
14> "Screw the Lipitor, I feel fine!"
13> "I'd always wondered what it would be like to try this with
a contortionist."
12> "Do I look fat in this hospital gown?"
11> "Autoerotic what? Never mind, it sounds like fun. I'll give
it a shot."
10> "Waiter! More bacon and gravy!"
9> "Waitasecond... what if one of you Jew doctors is the
anti-Christ?"
8> "Reverend Falwell here. Hello, Reverend Haggard! How are y--
What? '60 Minutes' found the video we made in Vegas?!?"
7> "My new grandson's name is Tinky Winky Falwell?"
6> "Agent McAvoy? What kind of name is that for a hooker dressed
like a school girl?"
5> "WTF? THEY CANCELED 'GILMORE GIRLS'!!!"
4> "... and if I have abused the trust and faith of millions for
personal gain, may the Lord strike me dead right here and n--"
3> "It's chilly in here. Could someone please turn up the
goddamn heat?"
2> "Lord, please send me where I can do the most good."
and the Number 1 Last Words of Jerry Falwell...
1> "Dear Penthouse, I never thought this would happen to me
on the way to churc-- AAAGH!"